At the end of every semester of English class, we will all be requested to complete a reflection essay, namely, to make a summary to what I have learned and experienced throughout the whole semester of classes. Like programs or organization activities, a retrospect is requisite. So, reflective writing is very useful and powerful because, first, it forces you to recollect the important skills or tips that would help you to reinforce your achievement; the second, it is the best way of self-knowledge and self-expressing. In the course of English 21001, the main object of our study is New York City, we studied it from in at least three disciplinary perspectives, writing, reading, and experiencing. The course theme is gentrification, the change in trends or conditions in New York City, for example, how did a grocery become a Chinses restaurant. We learned to open up and expose the inner workings of writing and learned to bring up opinions on different things and objects.

In this semester, I accomplished the essay of my one-week attention at my neighborhood which is a typical place for Chinese residence. I observed the overall environment in my neighborhood and the favorite spot that I would like to go. Also, I talked about the observation of strangers on the subway, and the luckiest thing I had in this week. The assignment I liked the best is the interview one. I interviewed a theatre director through email by voice recording, and I really enjoyed the process of typing out her words, highlighting the important pieces, managing and organizing these materials to become a profile for her. Additionally, I also shared a New York experience in one of the assignments, it was an experience of hanging out with a friend to a gay bar in Hell’s kitchen.

In this semester, I read 6 articles about New York City and the experiences from the authors. They are Whitehead’s “City Limits”, Patti Smith’s “Just Kid”, Stanley Milgram’s “The Experience of Living in Cities”, Gornick’s “On The Street”, and Gladwell’s “Tipping Point”. And a multiple chapter report of a homeless family, “The Invisible Child”. I read serval things and people from “On The Street” and combining it with my daily experience, the author talks about people of every description he has come across on the streets of New York, and it is very interesting and I liked it. Thousands of people have a thousand version of scenes. I have the same feeling to these street people like the author. I love the streets in New York. They are so amazing that who knows what kind of people would appear on them. Walking down the street, the only thing I do the most is watching people around me, people beside me, people passing by me, and people, and people. It is all about people. No matter what they are going to happen something to me or not, I am happy with it.

Professor Gina prepared many in-class informal writing exercises for us, such as the topic of what does your neighbor look like, what do you even overhead, what do you wish people know about you and so on. Sometimes it was hard for me to come up with some good words for them, in writing, I always have to brew and thinking about how to organize. And for the discussing part, I also enjoyed the whole process, because, without the careful guidance of Professor Gina, we could not keep on successfully. In my view, the difference of writing experience between high school and college is the writing process becomes freer and opener in college. The most important thing is, you can have your own opinions and perspectives only if you could back them up with ample evidence.

Personal speaking, there are still a lot of spaces for improvement for my writing. This is why I would choose English class every semester. If you have put efforts in it, you shall be aware that writing is fun. Writing is a process of accomplishing, it has the same trait with drawing, building, or cooking etc. For the reason that we see it growing and developing under our control until it becomes a whole, a complete work. I didn’t use to be very good at English, so it is more “All you can do is try to not be so crap at English”. Because you need English, really, if you want to be a bank worker or a filmmaker. If you want to be anything in the future in the United States. You need English, and keep on it. After all, I really appreciate my hardworking to stick to accomplishing these assignments and doing the various practice of in-class writing with the guidance of my professor, and all the effort I put into writing.

Length, action, what happens

Imagery

Resembles reality/ everyday

Dialogue/ dialect/ reference/ accent

Details Specific names (street, stops, direction), things, objects

Surprise/ unexpected Humor

To build yourself into a character

Know what you like from a distance

Be self-amusement

Know the beautiful of ordinary life

The common ways of people cope with the overload in the city

1. Allocation of less time to each input
2. Disregard for low priority inputs
3. Redrawing the boundaries in certain social transactions, so the overload system can shift the burden to other parties in the exchange
4. Reception is blocked off, city dwellers blocks inputs by assuming an unfriendly countenance
5. The intensity of inputs is diminished by filtering devices
6. Specialized institutions are created to absorb inputs
7. Disregard the needs, interests, and demands of those whom one does not

I like this reading. It describes the issues of living in cities, such as overload, tempo and pace, social responsibilities, and aspects of urban experiences, in-depth analyzing the city life.

The stories and various people that Gornick came across on the streets

Dog walker. Accident. Leonard. Neighbor. Death

Arguing couple. Lorenzo and Jane

Business people. Hardware store owner. Robbery

Coffee convoy. Homeless person. Police

Newspaper headline. Shopping lady. Bus lady

The theme of the reading

Friendship. Therapy. Quality of friendship

Social fidelity. Class. Isolation/Connection

Where I’m from

I’m from the crazy obsession of a social reasoning game at midnight 3.am

I’m from the sweet potato congee my dad brought me from outside in the morning

I’m from the one-hour train traveling on the subway

I’m from the visualization of a storyboard

I’m from the little pink box with a head of my dear friend

I’m from the chewing gum

Therapy

Dylan, with whom I went to this place, is my gay friend. He came to New York as a college exchange student from China in this first half year, and was lucky enough that could have an old acquaintance, me, to hang out within the foreign country.

We went to Therapy at night about 8 pm after having dinner together at Tonchin on 36^th street 5 Ave, a beautiful contemporary Japanese ramen restaurant, then walking ahead to 52^nd street between the 8^th and 9^th Ave. Without a doubt, therapy is a gay bar where attracts a large crowd of beautiful boys, and it has become the spot in Hell’s Kitchen. It is notable that we knew we were at our destination immediately as soon as we saw the symbolic rainbow flag hanging outside the door in midair. A security man was standing in front to check for our ID. We walked through a short corridor into its interior with the encircled mellow pop music gradually evoking my nerve. It is a dim duplex building, the two levels of slate floors connected by a dramatic staircase, crowned with a massive skylight.

Walking up to the second floor where the majority of people were on, a cute waiter served us with extreme enthusiasm to a small middle left table with two menus. All of sudden, I was surrounded by various males: man who dressed exaggeratedly like a woman, man who was kissing another man, man who was greeting and hugging with his friend, or man who were drinking to his date. I was nerves because I didn’t see a few women, and this was my first time to go to a gay bar. The whole bar was quite dark with flashing colorful lighting to build an ambiguous atmosphere for gay couples to have a fun date evening. Simultaneously, the music was set loudly enough so that we had to be very close to hear what the other said even the waiter, which was a usual rule in bars that give couples or strangers a chance to approach each other. There was a small stage in the front for some special shows, two rows of the booth with high seats on the two side against the wall, and we were sitting in the middle. I ordered a cheese fries for us and a cocktail, Psychotic Episode with Bacardi Coco, banana liqueur, orange juice, cranberry and pineapple juice; while Dylan had cocktail Freudian Sip with Ketel One Citroen, fresh ginger and lemonade. We shouted like crazy for the people who performed on the stage accompanied by the alcohol in the cocktails that began to work on our brains. Any gay bar like Therapy is a safe and relaxable place to stay with his love after a long week, and all the unhappiness and upset were drowned in the darkness.

The Week of Paying Attention

If You Could, Do Not Come to Visit

“Take to look! Take a look! 2 dollars for 1 pound of crabs!”

Accompanied by fishy smells, the sounds crying for seafood sales is more than a usual thing at the 8^th Ave in Brooklyn, nearby Sunset park, going up from 60^th street to 50^th street. They are whole ten streets where people are nourishing markets. And not only cries for seafood, but the stallers also cry for whatever they sell. While it is true that 8^th Ave is the hottest place where Chinese people live, known as the second Chinatown in New York City. However, I cannot really evoke a little bit affection to this area and manage to evade it as much as possible. In my eyes, the ambiance in my neighborhood is dirty and messy. Garbage that never would seem to be cleaned is full of the ground and near sunken sewers. Rough road and sidewalk, crazy heels to heels crowd, strange and masked flyers, carts, baby carriages and pregnant women everywhere, innumerable pharmacies, mobile phone shops, and remittance shops, and the whole bunch of vulgar people hang around without interesting souls. It is noisy and no sense of warm to me. Therefore, I feel fortuitous that my apartment is set at 6^th Ave. I understand that people live there to make a living, they have children to feed and work to do. But sometimes they are rude, speaking loudly without considering other’s feelings, no courtesy. Most people who have inappropriate behaviors were born in the last generation. The poor economic situation made them could not receive proper education in their childhood, growing up in countries in China and end up to here. Based on my knowledge, I have been living in my neighborhood for two years, and there are nothing changes in the ambiance expect some grand opening stores.

Although I cannot alter the look of my neighborhood, settling down where I live, there is one spot I like and visit frequently. In Whitehead said that everyone has their own “private New York”, and Sunset Park is mine. Sunset park locates between 5^th Ave and 7^th Ave, from 44^th street to 41^st street. There is a big uphill slope from 47^th street to 39^th street, hence Sunset park is obviously a small hill. The excellent dominant position makes it suitable and given a beautiful name, sunset. During summer, I would go jogging in the morning all the way from 59^th street to Sunset Park, breathing a ton of fresh air, sweating myself, and setting down on a small higher grassland under a big tree, watching the high buildings from the opposite across the Hudson River. In here, no noisy, no cries. All it has is pleasing green. In here, people play with their poppies and kids, chatting with their friends, leisurely. Time seems to fly slowly in Sunset Park. I felt happy because I felt good.

My History with The City

Brooklyn is my second intimate city. The first one is Fuzhou city in China, where I was born and bred, but my present apartment is the fifth. The last one is in Brooklyn. Before Brooklyn, I lived with my mother in different boroughs in Fuzhou. For the reason of moving, the different living environments let me know that everyone would have settled down in somewhere where you would adapt to when the time comes. Because you are going to live there, you are the new neighbor who is about to move in. And your subsequent lifestyle would also be changed. Personal speaking, Fuzhou city give me more a sense of mother, and Brooklyn is a sense of father, because the times I meet my father, for now, is more than the times of meeting my mother.

Napkins on The N Train

Oct 4^th, it was afterschool time on the way back to Brooklyn on the N train. The train arrived at the Canal street while people inevitably invaded in. A man sitting at the left side of me was playing a book of cross puzzles with earphones. He has already worked on page 21, no difficulty. On my right side, a girl was concentrating on a music game on her iPhone. She pressed the corresponding 4 bottoms super-fast, each bottom ringing different notes and playing out a full fast-beat song. They were the long-time inhabitants in this city for knowing what was better to do when they in such a situation. As for me, I forget to have my earphone with me. Confronting the crowd and the traveling time especially on the subway, it is utterly chronic torture. Suddenly, a woman sitting on the opposite noticed her bag was leaking. She was panic to find out her whole bottle of water running out inside her bag because of the untighten cap. A large piece of water stains appeared on her jean, wet. What’s worse, she took out her laptop and wondering what to do. People in such situation always receive help from others. The woman beside her saw the disaster immediately taking out a small piece of napkin to her. And the man standing next to her also contributed one. People who carried napkins all gave them to her so that she could wipe the stain up, either on the laptop or the floor. A black man kindly suggested her do not turn the laptop on until it got dry. Witnessing the entire process, I realized that we really cannot peremptorily judge a person simply from the surfaces. He or she might be the one who helps you in awkwardness.

A Necklace and A Gentleman

“Come, come, have a look.” I walked by his stall on Prince street on Broadway, smiling and saying no thank you.

One minute later.

“Hi, you girl, come here, take a look.” Watching me passing by his stall again, he spoke to me again in such a low voice, but at a level where it could still be heard. This time I hesitated and stopped, coming up to him. He was so happy and introduced his necklaces to me. I felt sorry to interrupt him since I had no intention of purchasing one. But what he has done next surprised me. He picked up a necklace and said to me, “I want to give this one to you. Just give it to you. I don’t want any money, uhm maybe some tips, because you are so beautiful and so nice to stop and talk to me. I am happy if you would have it.” He put it on my neck and adjusted it to its best length. It was a small white heart shape with a rainbow on it. The unexpected sweet gentleman was the best thing I had this week.

Reading the article of the invisible child, Dasani, the part of a side evaluation of Dasani’s intelligence from her teacher, Mckinney, stood out the most for me.

Dasani possesses what adults at McKinney consider an intuitive approach to learning, the kind that comes when rare smarts combine with extreme life circumstances. Her intelligence is “uncanny” and “far surpasses peers her age,” one counselor writes. “Student is continuously using critical analysis to reflect upon situations and interactions.”

Dasani is a beautiful, smart but spends her most childhood in a poor situation girl. She is only 10 years old, but she needs to take care of her big family. Can not imagine what sort of trouble things in every day a 10 years old girl has to think about.  In terms of her case, there are hundreds of thousand children like her living out there in this world, different areas and different countries, so I cannot imagine how many smart children like Dasani we are losing invisibly. Children are very important for every one of them has a unique and beautiful soul. We should do everything we could to help them, to help them become what they should be.

Stanley Milgram is one of the most important figures in the history of social psychology in America. He is best known for his controversial experiment on obedience conducted in the 1960s. In The Experience of Living in Cities, he talked about the primary living situation of cities through psychological aspects of life, using several facts, examples, and inquiries to show that how people cope with overload issue in cities, and how people respond to each other when it comes to social responsibilities or ethnic problems in great and fast-paced cities.

“Further, it is known that her cries for help were not directed to a specific person; they were general, but only individuals can act. And as the cries were not specifically directed, no particular person felt a special responsibility. The crime and the failure of community response seem absurd to us…The larger the number of bystanders, the less the likelihood that any one of them will intervene in an emergency.” This is very notable and thought-provoking to me. What kind of unbearable social responsibility people have on the shoulders? Why can’t they shout out loud to help people who in need? People become silent and step way back behind the line when facing issues that have nothing to do with them. Simply just no one start, no one follow. Indeed, like such a cry for a general help, who would consider it as their own business to handle and to care. A great majority of people follow a sepcific command. Because of the silence wall of people, crimes are easy to commit. Confronting living in an unfair city environment, people who are in silence should feel guilty and shame. Every one of them can escape the responsibility, however, since it is a huge number of people that there is nothing can do to investigate. Less intervening in emergencies not only appear in accidents, but also in classes, buses, or subways and so on. It is rooted in everyone’s mind. Therefore, for those people who cannot even take care of their personal lives, so how they can be expected to intervene in the bigger community in great cities. Not even to talk about social responsibility.

In Whitehead, it talks about the writer’s memory, inner thoughts and perspectives, and impressions to where he has ever lived, New York, in where has changed during years. The writer conveys a feeling of sentiment to the change in New York in his eyes—the things are still there, but men are no more the same ones.

The writer spent amounts of words to describe how things are different in New York compared to its old times, such as his neighbors, streets, apartments, and favorite shops, etc, and how he felt. He expressed his thought of seeing or passing by something changed by saying “you swallow hard when you discover that the old coffee shop is now a chain pharmacy”, “it happened overnight”. He said, “the city knows you better than any living person, because it has seen you when you are alone”, reflecting that he has experienced loneliness in this bustling New York city at night, and it was the only city itself, but not a person, has ever witnessed his alone, and to that I guess it means so much to him. Meanwhile, he has such a strong sense of belonging to New York city, because he believed if you didn’t witness old New York ever and didn’t feel it that way by yourself, then it is not part of your New York even if you heard it from someone else.

I could tell from his article that he cherished his city but didn’t got an opportunity to seize it, and he realized he actually has been losing it over time until years later. To him, his city has gone gradually in a way that he didn’t got a chance to say goodbye to it. “You didn’t know that each time you passed the threshold, you were saying goodbye.” On the other hand, he was glad that he has been a part of his city and lived with it.

After done the reading of Whitehead, the only recollection to my city I have even lived in comes to my head is the several times of house moving in China. I moved every other year before I have come to New York. A new environment for every period of my growth stages. Going to school in city and then going back to my hometown every New Years. Although my address moved in the same city, it gave me the different feelings of living in the disparate parts of it. The biggest impression to my city is the change of my hometown, especially in the period from my age 18 to now 21. It changed from a small, empty county to a developing and beautiful one; from many narrow, uneven stone roads to strips smooth and flat asphalt roads; and from no bullet train station to the one-hour distance away to my college. And there are more and more fancy restaurants opened in place of the roadside stalls for youngers.

I didn’t witness the change of my city as well as to anticipate the growth of it, the only thing I would do probable is just to praise its beauty with sighs when the next time I see it. Like the writer of Whitehead, I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to my city either but appreciate I have known it and embraced it ever. The best thing to do next is to seize my new city of New York, don’t let it flow away in the fingers of time.